Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Down home


I love going to see my Mom at the old homestead in Indiana. It's the place I feel a vibration of recognition. The fields, the secret ponds hidden beyond the next hill, all these welcome me back every time I cross the border.
I didn't appreciate it as much as I do now. Being young, we tend to overlook what we have been given. What I have been realizing, though, is that I have changed, living over here in Ohio. I have become used to the way people think and act here, and when I go back to Indiana, it's like a different planet sometimes. It's not that Indiana has changed...I have. And some of the people are just downright funny.

Just some random observations:
Mom sent me out to get lunch, and while waiting in line at Wendy's, the person behind me ordered a "Chicken Fillet". Not "chicken fill-ay"....he asked for a "chicken fill-et". I nearly bit my tongue off trying not to laugh.
***
On the way back up the hill, I passed a mailbox that I have never noticed:
A. J. Butt.
Seriously.
(Do you think he is the butt of any jokes?)
***
Later, at the Oxbow:
An elderly lady walked down to my car as we were preparing to leave. She struck up a conversation, and when she learned that I had grown up in Bright, she started listing her family tree that included places that don't even exist anymore.
"Y'all know that farm up in Mt. Pleasant that got tore up durin' that ternada back in 1990?"
And:
"Ya know, that water is up because those folks in Louisville (that's pronounced LOOvull) don't wanta get flooded, so they kept that there dam down there closed up."
And:
"Ah watched a squirrel (pronounced Scwall) try ta jump acrossed that there water and he fell. I was wishin' Ah had a board to float out to 'im."

There wasn't one article of clothing on this woman that didn't have multiple holes in it, including her shoes, but she had a bag of bird seed under her arm. She said "Those Oxbow people don't want to feed the birds."
And she said that she comes down there to collect "far wood".
Man.

In the midst of all that country-ness, is my Mom....the farthest from hillbilly you can get.

How did I escape from being a hick?
I sure don't know.
Y'all.




9 comments:

KGMom said...

Susan--too funny.
I think I must have been in yor nek of the woods (er yor mam's). I went to Loovill fer a meetin' and drove to Henryville, IN.
Would that be anywheres close?
Sorry--not too good at Indianan or Kentuckian.

Mel said...

You made me laugh sooo hard! hahaha, great post!

Susan Gets Native said...

Donna:
Henryville is WAY down the river from where my Mom lives. Bright Indiana is near Lawrenceburg, close to Cincinnati.
And hey..your Indianan wasn't too bad. I understood it.
: )
Mel: Thanks. I do like to make people giggle. These people today were just too much. I couldn't keep it to myself.
: )

Mary said...

Hilarious! This reminded me of my mother-in-law (may she rest in peace). She would say fill-it instead of fillet and gor-met instead of gourmet. And ya ain't heard nothin' until ya hear those Baltimorons speak. I don't know how I escaped it, either!

dguzman said...

I had no idea the hick-speak spread all the way up to Indiana, much less over to Baltimore! Wow. I loved "acrossed" -- that one kills me. I always wondered how it was spelled--I was guessing acrosst (like burnt), but then my Hick-speak was never that good.

Thanks for the hearty laughter.

ncmountainwoman said...

We returned to western NC after many years in a large midwestern city. Our daughter recently visited and I mentioned we were going on "Wiltzon" road as a bypass. She laughed and asked, "Since when does Wilson have a 't' in it?" I said, "Ever since we moved back here."

Great post, very funny and very true.

Cathy said...

Susan! I just crossed over from Mary's View. I figure anybody that is 'slaughtered' by her whimsy is OK.

And sure enough - this post is a hoot. Believe it or not - I've heard variations on those great pronunciations over yonder in hilly Loudonville, OH - where I grew up.

I love country people. You know where they stand.

Anonymous said...

ROFL Hell no we don't want to get flooded! You people up north are on your own, LOL

That was hilarious, now I'm all nostalgic :)

HUGS!
/ colleen

RuthieJ said...

What a hilarious post Susan! And I thought people from Minnesota talked funny.....