@#$%&ng snow

Word of the Day:

thaumaturgy \THAW-muh-tuhr-jee\, noun:
The performance of miracles or magic.

The snow began at 12 pm today, and just now stopped (9 pm). We got a good 8 inches of the crap. The girls' school was canceled before any snow even fell. Cincinnati sure knows how to panic about snow. But this time it was warranted. Swami called after he got home and it took him 2 1/2 hours to get back from the....yak corral.

Nellie and Boomer are bird watchers, too. Since I spent the day looking out the window, they did the same, trying to figure out what the heck I was looking at.

@#$&*ng snow.

The birds ate and ate all day. I supplied them with sunflower and safflower seeds, peanut butter, peanuts, insect suet, thistle, and granola bars.

Boomer loves to play out in the snow, but his little Boston body is ill-equipped for this kind of cold, so I limited his outside play time.

Nellie, on the other hand, being a Rottweiler/Labrador/German Shepherd/What-have-you type of dog, she can stay out there all day, it seems. She has taken to rolling every time she goes out, because she has some dry skin and needs to scratch.

This was the scene at 1 pm. Not too bad.

This is 4 pm. About 5 inches so far.

I kept going out with the broom and sweeping the snow away from the ground under the feeders to help the ground-feeding birds. The snow was so fluffy that the birds would land and they would sink up to their breasts. It would have been cute if it hadn't been so sad to watch.

Ahhh...I love my red-bellied woodpecker. Oops! He has peanut butter on his beak!

I picked up some dried mealworms, instead of live ones, because I have no way to keep them awake and alive in the cold. The starlings found it first. Any wonder they have taken over the country? They are always the first to exploit a food source.

I was hoping the Carolina wrens would take a few. But they wanted to either sit on the front tire of Geoff's car, or eat the spilled peanuts off the ground.

I made a lean-to for the dish of worms, to keep the snow off. One of the juncos investigated, but decided to go back to the seeds.

While Nellie keeps watch over the birds, Isabelle takes a picture of me taking a picture of her.

"Aaaaarrrroooooooo!"

Who wouldn't want this dog? Look at that. A kid scratching his belly while another dog licks his face. What a good dog.

Boomer Buns

Boomer lick

Nellie lick

A prayer for tomorrow:
Please, let me get the car out of the driveway so I can get the Hell out of this house
before I go coo-coo bananas.

Since I sat on my duff all day, when Geoff came down for dinner, I just HAD to do something constructive. So I went out and shoveled the driveway. Ever sweat and freeze at the same time?
Right now, Deliverance is on AMC. I have never seen the whole movie, but I always seem to turn it on right at the 'squeal like a pig' scene. That's disturbing. And what's on next?
Children of the Corn. Jeepers. More unfriendly locals.

Too cold....

Word of the Day:

daedal \DEE-duhl\, adjective:
1. Complex or ingenious in form or function; intricate.
2. Skillful; artistic; ingenious.
3. Rich; adorned with many things.

It's too cold to bird, too cold to do much of anything. I was low on bird seed, so I checked the cupboards for something edible for birds.
I found peanut butter, oats and a few nice, fruit-and-nut filled granola bars:

It figures that a stupid starling would find it first. I banged on the window to shoo him off.

The male downy wasn't too sure, but tried a few of the nuts.

One of the Carolina wrens was acting hungry enough to eat anything. I wish I had some spiders preserved in a jar or something!

Titmice are little feathered jackhammers.

Lorelei and drove over to the gravel pits to find the bald eagle, but I can't find him again. I just want ONE picture..is that too much to ask?
And all this coughing is getting on my nerves. It's literally a pain in my neck: I have been coughing so hard, my neck is all cranked the wrong way. I guess it will be the doctor's office tomorrow. Yuck.

One of the reasons I love Julie Zickefoose

For those of you who don't read Julie's blog, first I have to say "WHY IN THE HELL NOT???" and second, she put up a post this morning that may help us find a good home for Boomer.

Sunday Sketches

conspectus \kuhn-SPEK-tuhs\, noun:
1. A general sketch or survey of a subject.
2. A synopsis; an outline.

On days that I do absolutely nothing, I feel a lot of pressure to come up with a post that won't put you to sleep. So I came up with a post with my sketches...that have not a single iota of talent, but may make you smile. My sketches of some of the events from this week:

(My finding what may or may not be a snow goose)

Now, wasn't that fun?

That's all it takes

roseate \ROH-zee-it; -ayt\, adjective:
1. Overly optimistic; bright or cheerful.
2. Resembling a rose especially in color.

I had an education program way out at Chilo Lock #34 park today, one of my favorite birding spots. After the presentation, I was showing some of the kids my Party Favors (heads, feet, wings and feathers) when out of the blue, there was Katdoc! She lives pretty close to the park, and came down to see my program! Now, how cool is that? (Thanks, Kath)
We were talking about the peregrines that are seen at the dam down the road, and Kathi told me not to bother since she had just come from there and she didn't see any.
I took her word for it, but as I was nearing the dam on the way back, I just had to turn in, just to have a peek. And I am so glad I did!
Behold: A Snow goose. Life bird #117.

I couldn't even believe my eyes. It was hanging out with a flock of Canada geese, and I was pretty far away, so I almost didn't give them a second glance. But I had the scope with me, so I set it up in the lee of a tree (the wind was of the type that slices through you like frozen razor blades) and aimed it at the geese to practice. And there it was.
Thank goodness there was a birder down the way, and I walked down and introduced myself (turns out that he had been at my program) and asked him to look at the goose and confirm it.
Thanks, Steve Wagner!
We don't get too many snow geese around here, just isolated sightings here and there. And I found it all by myself.
*Boom shaka laka laka* Boom shaka laka laka*

When I got home, Geoff suggested that we all go get some dinner and decided on Burger King since it has a playground for the girls to burn up their energy. We rarely get to go out to dinner with all four of us present, so it was a nice change...I love my family.

And for some reason, Geoff and I were enticed to climb the jungle gym and go down the slide.
(I remember Geoff saying something about what a good blogging opportunity it was...that did it) This was no ordinary slide: It was in the shape of a corkscrew and was pitch black inside.
Geoff was brave...he went down head first.

I was yelling and laughing so hard, I couldn't sit up. I thought it would be a simple, short slide just a "whee!" and that's all. Well, this damn thing went on and on and I couldn't see where I was going and I was all like "Aiiiiiiiiiii!!"

Have I mentioned that I love Flickr?
I made this movie poster last night:

Click on the picture to go to flickr and enlarge it. There's quite a cast of characters listed...hopefully you can read the fine print.

As far as my last post:
Thank you for all of your supportive words and encouragement. Sometimes, that's all it takes.

Feelin' better, bald eagle, and why it's good to be friendly with other birders

Word of the Day:
moribund \MOR-uh-bund\, adjective:
1. In a dying state; dying; at the point of death.
2. Becoming obsolete or inactive.

Jeepers.

Did I see the bald eagle?
We will get to that in a minute.
First, there was a lot of mockingbird attitude going on in the front yard today.

Dude was all over the suet.
He was not a happy camper when the starlings moved in.

"Back off, you stupid starlings!"

"I mean it!!!"

"OH, I don't THINK so..."

"Okay, okay, we get the hint!"

"I rule this suet, because I am Mr. Yellow-Eyed Fluffy Pants."

"And I want THAT berry right THERE."

"What a beautiful specimen of my species I am."

Meanwhile, over in the crabapple, a cardinal dozed off...if you look close, you can see his nictating membrane.

Over in the back yard, I saw snow shadows. See the snow by the fence? The trees shielded it from the warm sun, and voila..snow shadows.

A flock of robins were tossing the leaves under the maples. I thought I would help them out by sweeping the leaves away from the base of the trees.
They approved.

Now, onto the eagle:
This is not an eagle. Just a red-tailed hawk.

I used my temporary scope (I so don't want to give it back) to check out the action at the gravel pits. I saw:
Coots
Ruddy ducks
Redheads
Buffleheads
Ring-Necked ducks
A female American wigeon, I think...some birders have seen a Eurasian wigeon here, but I was too far away to really be sure.
While scoping, a car pulled up behind me. A fellow birder came up and asked what I was seeing. She asked if I was looking for the eagle. Turns out that she had just seen it about 2 miles down the road. Hopped in the car and went searching.
Did I see the bald eagle?
YEP.
Did I get a picture of it?
NOPE.
Damn. I will try again.

Happy Groundhog Day/Full Moon.


I have wanted to bring up something for quite a while. I have had a post in draft mode for ages, but haven't posted it because it didn't feel right.
Lynne brought up her past use of antidepressants in a comment last night, and I love her for it. I know you all like me, so I feel safe in talking about my mental health.
I have been in therapy off and on since I was 13. First it was for motivation in school (IQ tests to show that I definitely had the brains, and realizing that I was just not being challenged enough) and a few years back when I was pregnant with Isabelle, a new therapist. He did nothing for me. Then, 3 years ago I found my soul-mate therapist. She has seen me through my Dad's passing, my anger, my depression.
I have been on antidepressants for 2 years now, and it seems to be working...except for the times that I react in ways that are not appropriate for the situation. I don't let these feelings out when I am away from my family, such as at a RAPTOR program or out in public. My safety zone is my family, and unfortunately my family also takes the brunt of my anger. I am not abusive, I do not hit, but I yell and I say things in ways I don't mean. The meds have reduced my depression and it feels great. (It looks like I have needed this for years, since high school)
Where does all this stem from? Partly, a chemical imbalance in my brain that I can't help. And partly, a crappy relationship that nearly squashed my self-esteem. When I was 16, I was dating a 22 year old man. Why would a man want to date a 16 year old? You can figure that out.
I wouldn't get into details. I will just say that he was not a nice person.
He was mean and abusive.
That relationship colored every other one to come along. Thank goodness Geoff is understanding. He obviously saw past all my baggage to look into my soul and saw the small, undamaged part of me. He taught me that I was worth loving.
The only thing in the way of me becoming the person I really am inside is that the meds and therapy aren't helping 100%. My therapist wants me to see someone else, to determine if I have "soft bi-polarity". Lovely. I don't think I am, but everyone I have told about it has NOT been surprised. I am not the type you see on TV shows...I just have mood swings from Hell. I am not Mother of the Year sometimes. I am not the wife that Geoff deserves. But I can be. I feel it. I want that.
So there you are. I'm not perfect, and I don't think anyone expects me to be. But I could be happier. You guys, who read my blog, see the side that I truly am, the ME that shows up in small bursts. The loony, fun, sweet Me. I want to invite her to stay forever.

Just try to stay awake

Word of the Day:
pellucid \puh-LOO-sid\, adjective:
1. Transparent; clear; not opaque.
2. Easily understandable.

What a non-day.
I attended a funeral this morning, which was nice, and peaceful, and sad.
For the past few days, I have been existing in a fog. Maybe the bronchitis, maybe the loopy cough syrup, maybe the winter, maybe depression. (Oh, we will talk about depression another day)
While on the west side of town, I stopped at the apartment complex I used to live in:

My dufus ex and I lived on the second floor. The balcony looked out on the Great Miami river valley (and the interstate). We weren't supposed to have any animals, but I snuck Queen in and kept her out of the windows.

Good ol' 8180 West Mill Street. It was a nice apartment, two bedrooms, two bathrooms, decent rent. But I cringe to think where I would have ended up if the dufus hadn't cheated on me. I don't think I would have met my true potential, and my life would just be sorry. Sorry and going nowhere.

Not a great picture...This is the family funeral home. I have said goodbye here to my Dad, my grandma, my grandpa, my uncle, friends, mothers and fathers of friends. We are here way too much. I didn't get a good photo because I didn't want anyone to see me taking pictures. Too tacky.

This bridge is down the road from the apartment. This bridge collapsed in 1989, and killed two people whose car went down with it. I think about that every time I cross it.

I am going to try and see the bald eagle that has been hanging out at the evil gravel pits. And that is all I am doing tomorrow. Katdoc, the stinker, saw it today.
Sigh...I wanna be happier.
Sorry I am not my bubbly self. Someone needs to slap me and tell me to snap out of it.