I survived it. (No "real" photos)

May I never have to go through that again.

I had the colonoscopy today and lived to tell the tale.

It went quite smoothly.

The doctor removed two polyps:

(Photo courtesy of http://www.upmccancercenters.com)

and he took multiple biopsies (isn't that a Scary word??) to check for a fairly rare condition called microscopic colitis:

There are two types of microscopic colitis; lymphocytic colitis and collagenous colitis. In lymphocytic colitis, there is an accumulation of lymphocytes (a type of white blood cell) within the lining of the colon. In collagenous colitis, there is an additional layer of collagen (scar tissue) just below the lining. Some experts believe that lymphocytic colitis and collagenous colitis represent different stages of the same disease.

This type of colitis is only seen when a tissue sample is examined under a microscope. So I will have to wait a week until the results are back.

So, there you have it.

Thank you, everyone, for your good wishes and attempts at humor.

:)

And thanks to Jim, the Yak Herder, for updating everyone while I was doped up today.

I now give you a respite from all this talk of colons and biopsies, with a contraband photo I took at the Cincinnati Art museum a few years ago. There was an exhibition of some Monet paintings, and I was taking pictures, when a guard came over and said that I couldn't because the paintings were on loan, blah blah blah. So I stopped, but I still got a good one of one of the "Waterlilies" paintings. Hee hee.

Yeah, you all are a bunch of comedians

Well, I survived drinking a gallon of evil, evil stuff.
Pam asked what the ingredients are:

Polyethylene Glycol 420 g (Wait, isn't that the stuff in antifreeze??)
Sodium Bicarbonate 5.72 g (I think that is the stuff in some antacids.)
Sodium Chloride 11.2 g (Salt...eeww)
Potassium Chloride 1.48 g (Oh, Hell, I don't know...paint remover?)


Put all that together and you get DRANO.



During my day of confinement, I had a lot of time to think, watch the birds..
Oh, cute moment: I was kneeling on the couch, looking out at the feeders. I glanced to my left and all THREE dogs (Bailey's here for 2 weeks) were sitting up with their front paws on the back of the couch, watching the birds with me.

Boomer wouldn't leave my side. When I laid down on the couch, he either laid down with me or sat by the couch, with his chin next to my face. When I went to the restroom, he came in and laid down on my feet.

At one point, there were four bodies on the couch:
I was curled up in a semi-fetal position, Bailey was on my feet, Boomer was behind my knees, and Nellie was actually laying ON me. That wasn't as obnoxious as it sounds...yes, she weighs about 70 pounds, but half of her was on the back of the couch, so I only got half of her weight. Very considerate of her. It was a nice moment...snuggled warmly under a big comforter, warm doggie bodies wrapped around me...and then I had to get up and go to the bathroom, AGAIN.

I lit a fire in the fireplace for warm and comfort. When I closed my eyes, the flames were casting shadows and light across my eyelids, and I started thinking what life was like back before electricity (and the Internet, and TV). Life was illuminated by either the sun, the moon or a fire or candle. And I came to the opinion that THAT'S why we just aren't as romantic as we used to be. Nowadays, when we want to "set the mood", what do we do? Light some candles or lay a fire in the grate. See?
Firelight is great for bringing on the romance. It's beautiful to look at, and it's way more flattering that incandescent bulbs. It makes our eyes shine, softens our features...

No, there were no narcotics in the drink. (I'm sorry to say)
Why, may I ask, do they not sedate you during the prep, too ?!? I would gladly have slept through this day, if I had the option.
Coming up tomorrow, if I can swing it....pictures!
Don't worry, Pam. I will warn all of you in the title!

Added later:
Please welcome Mary's View to my blogroll!

Sweet Mother of God...

...kill me now.

I've had three glasses of this nectar of Satan.
Flavor packs, my Aunt Fanny.
It tastes like soapy salt water.

Prep me up, Scotty!

Try this on for size, my little chickadees:
Tomorrow begins the preparations for my colonoscopy.
I can only have clear liquids, and here's where the fun really begins, kiddies.
I am picking up a "Trilyte" solution, one whole gallon of it, at the pharmacy, in the morning. I have to drink 8 ounces of this stuff every TEN minutes, until it's gone. What exactly IS "Trilyte"? It is a laxative. I have to drink a gallon of laxative.
**I will let that sink in for a minute**
A gallon.
Of laxative.


I am now accepting sympathy comments.

On to better things:

I had the best program tonight. I was presenting at a school of music, which is in a private residence. The owners of the school threw a "Harry Potter" party for their students. Everyone was in costumes, and there was Butterbeer, and creepy music and a "Snack Trolley". Anyone who has not read the Harry Potter books: 1. Shame on you. and 2. Read them.
The kids ranged from 6 to 16 and were so interested, and polite and great.
I brought owls, of course. The owner introduced me, and said that I was there to teach them about "The Care of Magical Creatures". It was too cute.

Taking the owls home back to the barn tonight, I got out of my car and was heralded with the sound of Junior, hooting his feathered butt off. He was in a tree right across from the barn and there were no begging calls tonight. It was all about the hooting. He sounded pretty macho. If I was a female GHO, he could have turned my head.
I recorded him on my phone with the Voice Memo option, but I can't figure out how to get it off my phone and onto the blog. I know that there is a thing on Blogger where you can do audio posts to your blog, so maybe next time, I will call the number and let Junior leave you a message!

Update on the screech owl I picked up the other night:
Email from Cindy, the rehabber I took him to:


The SO's right eye is probably blind. After our eye vet returns next week, hopefully he will be able to see him. That is an improvement over his initial assessment. The eye was misshapen and gelatinous - thought it was collapsing, which is an euthanasia case because of the extreme pain. However that has improved. He is eating well on his own and has quite an attitude.

A bird quiz thingy

I got this from Laura, who got it from Patrick, who got it from....you get the picture.
Feel free to copy and paste it on your blog.
(I would be interested in what non-birders would have to say on this quiz)


What state (or country) do you live in?
Ohio

How long have you been birding?
4 years

Are you a "lister"?
Yes

ABA Life List:
93

Overall Life List:
What's the difference???

Favorite Birding Spots:
Magee Marsh, Northern Ohio

Favorite birding spot outside your home country:
I haven't been there, but I hear that Point Pelee is hoppin'!

Farthest you've traveled to chase a rare bird:
I don't have the luxury of chasing rare birds.

Nemesis bird:
Golden Eagle

"Best" bird sighting:
Bald Eagle near Magee Marsh...the girls were asleep, and Geoff and I watched it together.

Most wanted trip:
Either Cape May or the crane gathering in Nebraska

Most wanted bird:
That's a tough one to answer...a Snowy Owl or a Great Gray (of course, they are raptors!)

What model and brand of bins do you use?:
Bushnell something or others...

What model and brand of scope do you use?:
Don't have one.

What was the last lifer you added to your list?:
Ruby-crowned kinglet

Where did you see your last lifer?:
My yard

What's the last bird you saw today?:
A cardinal, I think

Best bird song you've heard ever:
Song Sparrow...I know, not very exciting

Favorite birding moment:
Any moment that involves me alone in the woods

Least favorite thing about birding:
Bugs

Favorite thing about birding:
It gives me a reason to get out of the house

Favorite field guide for the US:
All time field guide is Birds of Ohio / McCormac-Kennedy

Favorite non-field guide bird book:
To See Every Bird on Earth /Dan Koeppel

Who is your birder icon?:
Birdchick (aka Sharon Stiteler)

Do you have a bird feeder(s)?
Yes, about 10 of them!

Favorite feeder bird?
Any woodpecker

Doesn't anything F***ing Work?????

You know, technology is great and all, but when it doesn't work I get crazy.

1. My car isn't running. So I have to haul kids and raptors in Geoff's little Saturn. It gets crowded. And call me strange, but I get a bit upset at the lack of room just to turn my head to change lanes.

2. My camera doesn't work. And I have seen cool stuff lately that I may never see again. But maybe my DH will spare a bit of that book advance money and let me go get a good camera.
(Geoff never comments on my blog, but I bet that will get a response.)

3. Our cable isn't working. I had almost the WHOLE day to myself (from 1:00 pm until 8:30 pm) since Geoff, the fabulous husband and father he is, picked up the girls at school and took them with him to a book signing up in Dayton. I was all set to order the new X-Men movie (I love movies like that...I'm also a Trekkie...still think I'm cool?) and the EFFING cable is just sitting there, not doing it's job. A technician is coming out tomorrow to fix it, but does that help me today? NO.

Well, at least the computer wor
****just kidding.

Hang in there, kiddos. I will get a new camera and I will get out there and resume bringing you all the riveting scenes of my life.
Blog update:
Welcome Patrick, Toothpaste For Dinner and Melanie to my blog roll.
And I moved some stuff around and categorized all my blog links. So now you can either check out my Family and Friends links, the poor non-birding freaks, or jump right to some fine birding and nature blogs, because we all know you want just birds, birds, birds all the time.

Not a 100 mile bird, but close...yawwwwnnnnn

I just got back from a bird pickup.
This time, it was a gray screech owl, probably hit by a car. The wonderful citizen who called it in said it was just sitting in the middle of the road.
I saw blood on the owl's beak, but no other obvious injuries. I dropped it off at Marc and Cindy's so they can work their bird mojo.

***
See any pictures here? Me neither.

What makes me crazy is that I have, stored on my camera, great pictures of the girls in their Halloween costumes! And I am sure there are a few bird pics in there, too.
Damn.
***
And an update for all of you obsessed with my colon:
I have my procedure scheduled for Monday. So if I can sweet- talk the tech and if I am not too stoned, I will post about my lovely experience, complete with photos.
How WILL we wait through the weekend???
***
Bird sighting: A flock of cedar waxwings visited the front yard today. And they stayed, and stayed, and posed....and did my camera work? Hell no.